I'm leaving this place behind. It's time to start a new path in life.

The words will be the same. The love and hope shall be enshrined in a new place.

Same old rubbish. Different set of clothes.

Come drop by.

http://quietfury.blogdrive.com

I never knew that dragons and flowers could ever get their roles in life mixed up.

But for dragons to think that they resemble flowers, is especially hilarious. And decidedly misguided and self-deceiving.

Priceless.

The End.

PS: To all those who have said something to my previous post, I'd like to say thank you. It's been nice to receive support for a change. I've been doing alot of thinking, (all that self-worth and 'what would the world need me for anyway' sort of thing) and well, you know how these things can lead you down a path of doubt.

The jury's out on whether I'll quit or not. Meanwhile, the band blog will still receive its fair share of updates, since I'm not quitting the band, but quitting as its leader. I guess that's all.

I'm quitting this.

Forever? I don't know. Heart's not in it.

Not like anyone reads anything here anymore. Think I shouldn't stop? Drop a comment.

But yeah, I doubt anyone is going to say anything.

OK, first things first.

Three gigs/shows/competitions in the next three weeks. The first one is on the 20th of May, at the Harbour View Hotel, Kuching. Occasion? Its SATT College's Prom Night, and we're going to perform. Song list? Tentative : -

1. Peterpan - Mungkin Nanti
2. Peterpan - Mimpi Yang Sempurna
3. Incubus - Drive
3. Muse - Sing for Absolution/Unintended
4. Incubus - Nowhere Fast
5. Peterpan - Semua Tentang Kita
6. Coldplay - Fix You
7. All American Rejects - Dirty Little Secret/Swing Swing
8. Silly Angels - Fall From Grace/Us Against The World/Three Bedroom Apartment

This is tentative. Band members! Any questions, hit me back, You know where to find me. We've been asked to perform at least 8 songs, by the organisers, so we have alot of scope for this. A good mix of slow and fast.

Second thing : Battle of the Bands, 27th May, 2006. 11 am till late first day. If we make it through, the second day is on the 28th, 11 am till 3 pm. Two songs, a hardcore crowd. It's gonna be a blast. Tentative Song List :

1. Incubus - Megalomaniac
2. Muse - Stockholm Syndrome

Excellent choices, I believe. Sure to rock the crowd and keep them going. It's time that the Kuching scene was properly introduced to Muse, by a band that will do them justice! ;)

Third thing : A show for the opening of a mini theme park in MJC, Batu Kawa, Kuching. There will be two bands, of which the Silly Angels will be one of them. Date? 1st June 2006. Time? 10a.m till late, I'm assuming, Details are sketchy, but we'll get paid, nontheless. Song list? Tentatively, it'll be this : -

1. Peterpan - Any or all we know
2. Radja - any or all we know
3. Incubus - fast and slow ones, not necessarily the hard rock tracks
4. Muse - Fast and slow ones
5. All American Rejects - Fast and slow ones
6. My Chemical Romance - Ghost of You, and/or Helena
7. Anything we know thats a crowd pleaser.

This one will be the biggest show we'll have a privilege to be part of. Entrance is free, so members of the general public are indeed encouraged to join in the activities. There's a pool, rides, etc. More details will be added as I get to know them.

And for those of you who came to this blog from the main Silly Angels profile, I've just uploaded our first ever song. Ok, its just an acoustic firsttake, and it was done on a cheap mike I happen to have lying around. So apologies for the sound quality and missed pitching, and slightly offkey areas. But I love the overall feel of it.

If you don't know where to find it, goto http://www.myspace.com/sillyangels. It'll be there in the top right of the screen. :) The drums, bass, Lead, effects, everything, haven't been recorded, added or properly arranged. So yeah, we'll see how it turns out. (=

I know, you'll argue with me that it should be on the 28th. (=

But our conversation that night was after midnight, meaning that it was already the next day, the 29th. So this is our rightful anniversary. Hehe. I know it hasn't really felt like a month (and at times, boy, it really has). But with each passing day, I'm more and more convinced, if I wasn't convinced before, that I need you more than I would ever realise.

I knwo that our relationship has been a delicate balancing act, but I know that we will get it right. I love you, love you deeply in a way that would be beyond my limited capabilities to describe. You have me at a loss for words. And with me, that's not usually a good thing.

But in this case, so different from any time before, I know it's a good thing. Right. How it should be.  How I've needed it to be. You've shown me what I've needed all along, when I had never realised that I was ever in need.

You.

Where there was once a stutter in how the days went by, they go from one to another in an indescribable flow that belies the utter grace with which your love has enriched and fulfilled me. How could I offer more than what you give me? How could I ever hope to repay the debt of love and wholesomeness that you have gifted to me?

I can't.

But I will try, regardless. Because as I have said before, and as I will always say to you, you are worth everything that I could ever do for you. And more.

Happy 1 month, sayang. Here's to many more of them.

I love you, princess.

With every fibre of my being, with every wisp of my soul.

Do not let the gloom of depression cloud that, dear. You make me happy. A happiness that goes deeper than just smiles and laughter. You give me security. That feeling of knowing that our feelings for one another are assured, and completely true.

You give me something I've never really had throughout my life.

You give me peace.

I'm sorry I can't do anything right.

I'm sorry I come up short in more ways than just words.

I'll get it right. I know I will. I hope you know that too.

How do you explain something that cannot be put into words?

I know I usually say that. especially here on this little space of mine. But for once, I am indeed speechless. For all my perceived eloquence and supposedly bombastic vocabulary, I just.. cannot do it. I cannot explain how beautiful this feels.

I cannot share with whomever that reads this, how wonderful this all is.

My failings and shortcomings have been brought into shar focus by her. I know for sure where I am not good enough. Yet most importantly, I know for sure where I am. I know for sure, that I am good enough and desrving of all that she can give me. Of all the love that she could ever hope to offer.

How often does that happen?

How often do you find yourself willing to do all you can for someone, knowing, just absolutely CERTAIN, that she will do all she can for you? Could a person ask for any more than this?

Could you?

I knwo that many others go through life looking for that one special person who will make that critical, oft-overlooked difference. The difference that reminds you the glass is half-full. The difference that tells you that the rain is only temporary, so that you will learn to appreciate the sun. The difference which tells you, in no uncertain terms, with all vestiges of ambiguity and vagueness erased, there there is happiness in this world. Even if you don't see it.

Because love is something that you will never be able to see. Love is never something that you will be able to touch, or hear.

How could something so infnitely amazing, yet crazily simple, ever be entrusted to the callous senses of humanity? It just isn't. It shall always remain deeper than that. Deeper than the words that flow forth from the perceived genius of the human intellect.

All of this does not being to describe what it is like to be with her. All of this cannot hope to match up the way that she distorts my negative view of the world, and makes me realise that life is never that bad at all. All of this will never make anyoen understand how much I love her. Or how much she loves me.

There is no point for this being written. There is no motive, nor is there any reason for me to do this. Or maybe there is one, that I do not see. And will never see. Except perhaps, to tell the world that you should take a chance.

Because when there is love to be found, nothing is not worth losing.

Nothing.

... You have to be a sore loser.

Nobody celebrates the rest, it's the winners that count.

And when it comes to the things I believe in, I am the sorest loser of them all.

We got third, behind punk rock Green Day/Simple Plan wannabes.

Fuck.

I know I said we would play for fun, not exactly to win. We rocked them with our spectacular rendition of Ghost of You. We got them on their feet with Hysteria. We wooed them with Plug-In Baby, and bounced them with That Thing You Do.

And we're fucking sore as hell that we got beat by a band that couldn't sing and could only jump around and act funny on stage. What are we, comedians in training?

Fuck.